Read an extended rumination on the past two years -- and see some more drawings -- after the jump.
So only recently have I begun to climb out of this two-year-long creative rut. I'm getting better at fighting/ignoring the critical demons that start yelling the second I sit down at my desk. I used to blame said demons on my decision to go to graduate school for comics. I said that it turned what was once a beloved mental sanctuary into an ordeal, a minefield of resentments, and I started thinking too much about it and thinking about what other people would think and it started poisoning everything, and I started thinking too much about how everything was poisoned, and I couldn't stop thinking about how I was thinking too much.
Eventually the resentment got too annoying to maintain and I decided to get over it. I decided not to blame anything or anyone for my rut, and I let it run its course just like everything runs its course. I wasn't making any of my own artwork but I was teaching art to small children, which helped me get out of my own head. I was painting and drawing with kids every day and having a great deal of fun. I started keeping a joint sketchbook with my then-boyfriend, which was also fun. I stopped taking all this shit so seriously. I asked my friends to give me requests for drawings, and I drew them without thinking too much. Eventually the teaching job ran its course as well and I found myself wanting to draw and paint for myself again.
I was going to say that I've come "full circle" but 1) that expression is pretty corny and 2) I can't say I'm in the same place I was in before this rut began. I still feel a little uncomfortable making comics. I have ideas and interests I didn't have two years ago and am figuring out through trial and error the best way to express them. I have really high hopes for the future, but I'm making sure not to think too much about any of it.
I don't know why I'm writing all this... I guess just to explain that this blog is here so that I can figure things out as I go, and share it with everyone as I do.
Anyway, here is some of the stuff I've drawn this year.
Here are bits and pieces of the sketchbook I kept with Aaron (just bits and pieces; the majority of it is ~private~ or something):
And here are some drawings I made in response to friends' suggestions.
My high school English teacher (do you recognize the book?)
"Splinter vs. Yoda"
"screaming children"
my friend Olga: "falcor. with me on it. living the dream."
"tiger bank robbers"
"bird lady"
"Cat diving under the water, .... wait, cats hate the water... oh well, then a dog"
And here's some other random stuff:
A picture I drew of Tavi the Style Rookie.
Drawn from a photograph in National Geographic.
